Major red flag.” Reading that and seeing the subsequent likes on it made me bristle. Plus, I got to laugh really hard, which is hands down my number one favorite thing to do.Īnd yet, when I shared this exchange online and made it clear that I found it to be light-hearted and fun, some people shared their distaste, including one Instagram comment that read, “with him knowing your past trauma, I don’t think it should be brought up, not even jokingly. Being direct about what his joke made me think of while simultaneously burning him in the process allows me to take control of the moment and my own narrative. It would feel much worse to me to hear my current fiancé make a joke about calling off our wedding and then have to pretend it didn’t remind me of what already happened. One of the things I have always loved about my current relationship is that we have never had to tiptoe around the fact that I was engaged before and that that person abruptly left. When that moment happened in real life, we both burst into laughter, and I felt proud of my quick retort. For example, I recently shared an exchange with my fiancé where he jokingly threatened to call off our wedding and-since my ex had already done that two years ago-I replied, “Try to be original for once.” But when it comes to making fun of myself and my lived experiences, I feel as though I should get to decide what is or isn’t okay. I don’t believe that everything is fair game for comedy, and I am firmly opposed to any sort of humor that hurts people for the sake of a (most likely racist or homophobic) joke.
That’s partly why it’s been surprising to see people trying to monitor what is and isn’t appropriate for me to joke about online when it comes to my own life. But I am not everyone and the ability to joke about the darker parts of my life and history has always been my favorite coping skill. I’ll admit that this brand of humor isn’t for everyone. The silly video ends with me lamenting “not again!” to an empty room. So many issues that are then projected onto her partner.” In the TikTok, I address this criticism while oblivious to the fact that John is sneakily packing his bags and “leaving me” in the background. One of my favorites to date is a video where I addressed a comment that said, “It’s starting to make sense why the previous guy left. If you follow me on social media, you’ve probably noticed that I make a lot of jokes about my ex-fiancé walking out on me.
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